Human Connection

We instinctually yearn for human affection and attention - it is the condition of being human. To overcome the need to be needed and the need to need marks a transition of one's sense of self and spiritual being.

But for the rest of us who waddle along this earth as ordinary beings - plagued by the emotional void that steals our every waking moment - we long to love and be loved; even if it were just for that one fleeting moment, even if we knew that it wouldn't last.

And so we hope - that that one person makes the first move or shows the first signs of interest and attraction. We expect. We long. We anticipate. It underlies all relationships, romantic or otherwise. It pervades the condition of every mortal connection even simple friendship. And the greater something or someone seems more important, significant and 'meaningful' the more we crave and yearn. Sometimes the inaction and passivity stirs anger and indifference as retaliatory reactions, at others it causes us to live in the continued delusion of sterile independence. But from the corner of our eye we glance, hoping that that person is looking too.

This is the paradox of human relationships when pride, insecurity, and insufficiency mingle with the beauty and spirituality that is found in human connection. And the more we are rejected by unfulfilled desire the more we turn bitter, cold and isolated.

I look introspectively at my own life ... to see the truth that is of human connection. I look at the relationships I've formed to assess their importance in my life. I look at the relationships that I yearn to form but can never or would never ... and I see how that paradox has shaped so much of my fears in making connections.