It's Friday ... the end of it; and the end of another day, just like every other day.
In our haste and speed we often fail to find solace and quietude for a moment of reflection. I managed to grasp a really short one just a while ago, after finishing some work most definitely.
What came to my mind in reflection? Random thoughts of times past, times present. But what startled me most was the thought of the future, rather the thought of thinking about the future. In some way I'm beginning to feel the ennui that many of my age do, particularly those who have been working for some significant years. What is there ahead apart from the bigger paycheck, larger house and fancier car? One wonders ... maybe there isn't much more really.
It's not a dead end and certainly not mid-life crisis. I still have my further studies to look forward to. Yet one is never quite certain what can, or cannot, happen in the near future. I still love what I do but it gets drearier with each passing day. The energy lost each day at school never seems to get replaced. It's one of those things - particularly so when one is involved in an occupation that has a strong emotional and 'human' dimension. Ironically, the longer one stays in the profession, the lesser one really deals with the 'human' - the students.
When I was doing teaching practice at Commonwealth, I looked forward to a new day not only because of the students but because I knew I was going to school to meet good friends - real friends. Can't say the same now. Think one of the main reasons why I still do not dread going there day after day is the students, particularly my class. If it weren't for that adorable lot, the numerous hours of the most significant part of the day would be a hellish existence.
Well, back to preparation for tomorrow's Open House.
1 comment:
passerby:
recall the happy times that you've had. and cherish the thought while you are going through your boring and tiring everydays.. and things would be fine. days wouldn't be that horrible.
sometimes the computer screen makes one glum, get out and feel the wind, look into the sky, breathe the air. it's a wonderous feeling.
cherish.
i enjoy reading your blog. thanks for posting.
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